Wedding Consultations & Rehearsals:

Important Preparation & Practice

Practice and preparation is important and highly recommended under many if not most circumstances. It is for the couple’s and bridal attendant’s benefit to avoid a stressful experience in favor of a comfortable and happy one. Many couples have pre-conceived ideas of what a wedding in Hawai`i or a Hawaiian wedding is like because they may have seen it on the Travel Channel or on the Internet and feel they can omit a rehearsal. We can’t emphasize enough that our ceremonies are not conventional, not generic, not offered elsewhere and not like any other. You’ll be participating in many unique ceremonial activities that you’ve never seen, never heard or experienced before. The ceremonies are tightly orchestrated – what is done and spoken before a passage closely relates to what is done and spoken after a passage – and it flows in harmony almost like a dance. If couples have a chance to practice and then polish these many ceremonial elements, the experience becomes flawless and smooth-flowing like a ballet. Large, customized, complex ceremonies, and weddings that include the Japanese or Spanish languages will likely require a consultation/rehearsal while small and intimate weddings may not, but this can only be determined by couples furnishing the details of their ceremony so we can better advise you. Other options may be available primarily for the Lei Alohalani ceremony, to suit most scheduling and budgetary needs for the most small and intimate ceremony. Couples who decide to omit a rehearsal if one is advised is responsible for orchestrating their own procession and recession and orienting Kahu Silva prior to the ceremony. E-mail or call for guidance.

Formal Ceremony Consultation & Step-By-Step Walk Thru Rehearsal

The formal consultation/rehearsal is always longer (1 hour allocated) than the ceremony itself to further ensure that the ceremony does not suffer from the stress of hesitation and of not knowing what to expect, what to do and when. The session includes but is not limited to a very comprehensive description of the ceremony, a detailed explanation of the various cultural symbology, recommendations and planning of the procession/recession, the proper way that Dad’s present their daughters during the processional, the correct ring presentation, the answering of all questions, and advice regarding various non conventional/non-traditional circumstances or problems. Among the unique ceremonial elements is a special Hawaiian groom’s processional, Kahu’s signature double lei weaving & exchange ritual, a highly symbolic hand-holding that makes for a very smooth and beautiful transition during the ring exchange, the correct direction to turn if honoring parents with leis, etc. If couple’s choose not to practice, Kahu will exercise his option of whether to include or omit some of these special elements.

Pre-Wedding Consultations & Additional Meetings

We recognize the importance to couples of getting to know and creating a rapport and connection with their officiant. Kahu makes every effort to accommodate couples as best as he can but his time is extremely limited due to many commitments. Therefore, all consultations are prioritized first for couples who have confirmed their wedding with a payment and 2nd when couples are still undecided and considering other officiants who are most serious and therefore willing to pay the nominal $35 (Kahu’s office) or $50 (couple’s preferred site) consultation fee. These fees are part of the Formal Consultation/Rehearsal services offered. One hour is allocated and that’s usually ample time. Kahu is not one to watch the clock and frequently goes beyond that time without charging to ensure that all couple’s questions are answered for their complete understanding.

More to Come…



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